TikTok is basically the Purim story. The government set a date for it to be destroyed, it was miraculously saved, and everyone celebrated. So, what better way to celebrate Purim than to exploit our traditional practices for social media profit?
There are four commandments associated with the holiday of Purim, and I’m answering what you really want to know: how well optimized each of them is to the TikTok algorithm. The megillah isn’t the only thing that’ll be scrolling this Purim!
Follow this simple guide to go more viral than Vashti:
1. Seudah (Festive Meal)
You’ve seen plenty of GRWM videos, but have you ever seen one that lasts for 180 days?! Okay, fine, our banquets aren’t as elaborate as Ahashverosh’s, but they can still drive engagement even farther than the distance from India to Cush.
What you need for viral food content is functionality plus some glamor: people have to want to eat it…but also be able to make it.
Start with some artisanal savory hamantaschen that’ll just look irresistible—maybe fig jam and goat cheese. For dessert, everyone does Nutella hamantaschen, so you need to think bigger: only the finest single-origin Italian hazelnuts, photographed in the glow of the finest single-origin ring light.
Our ancestors feasted upon being saved from destruction, but you’re celebrating your new internet stardom, which is basically the same thing, right?
2. Mishloach Manot (Gifts to Friends)
Lots of people do themed mishloach manot, but you’re going to do them one better: curated, personalized experiences that will make your friends swoon–and produce the best possible content for your growing social media empire. Does your friend like Heated Rivalry? Get some hockey uniforms, the most…suggestive food items you can find, bring along another friend in a referee uniform, and of course get some Montreal bagels and Boston cream donuts for regional accuracy. Treat them to a full day of “hockey” while the camera rolls, and soon you’ll be rolling in the dough (or rolling out the dough, if you still need to make hamantaschen). I just hope your friend isn’t obsessed with The Pitt, because then your mishloach manot might get messy…
(And if you’re looking for something to hold your mishloach manot, check out EJ’s hamantaschen-themed tote bags!)
3. Matanot L’Evyonim (Gifts to the Needy)
Some schmuck named Maimonides said the best form of tzedakah is when no one knows about your giving, but you know better: pics or it didn’t happen, and by pics we mean showing off your generosity to the entire internet. (I mean, really, Maimonides, isn’t one TorahRefers to the first five books of the Hebrew Bible, the Tanakh, also called the Five Books of Moses, Pentateuch or the Hebrew equivalent, Humash. This is also called the Written Torah. The term may also refer to teachings that expound on Jewish tradition. Read more enough, why do we need a second? But I digress.) Make sure to emphasize how personally distraught you are at other people’s plight, all while doing something which looks really helpful on video but which no one actually asked you for. It’s too bad MrBeast isn’t Jewish, but you’re going to get all of the mitzvah points he’s missing out on! And hopefully at least a fraction of his follower count.
4. Megillah (Purim Story)
Feasting, murder, court intrigue, sex, revenge, intermittent fasting…this scroll has everything! But how will anyone ever know—unless you tell them in a short-form vertical video? There must be some desperate C-listers on Cameo who could do great voiceover work! Whether or not you read from a scroll, you’re bringing parchment back—but, like, the cowhide kind, not a digital startup or whatever. Congratulations on entering the creator economy, even if, just like our ancestors, you don’t get any of the spoils.
As I always say, who needs a synagogue community when you can become briefly internet famous? With these simple steps, you’ll have more followers than the casualties in Chapter 9 of the megillah!
Wishing you a happy Purim. After all, it can’t be “doomscrolling” when the Jews do get saved.
